Jack Burns Lives!

I’m often called to task for my pessimism and grumpiness. A fair accusation and one I don’t mind, because it puts me in the company of some pretty great people. Mark Twain, Edward Abbey, Emma Goldman, Arthur Schopenhauer, even Woody Allen. It’s often hard to be optimistic in this world, especially when you bury your head in history books and ponder man’s work to date. Overall, the story is pretty bleak, although there certainly are many bright spots.

Last night was one of those bright spots. A night when people of all walks of life and socioeconomic backgrounds filled the capital of the most powerful nation in the world, a nation that has the power to do either immense good or bad, and said “we are one and we’re for change.” We’re for equality, fairness and peace. We’re for everyone having their fair share and the elimination of poverty. We’re for a better environment and for being a better steward of the world’s resources.

They sang together. They prayed together. They danced. It was a beautiful thing, and it somehow reminded me of how the country seemed to come together after 9-11, but in joy, not sadness.

The success of the movement depends on how well it stands up against the corruption and despoliation that Washington and Wall Street can bring. For the unfortunate reality of the situation is this. There are people that could really care less about that event or about the hopes and dreams of millions. They only care about their own little universe, at the center of which lies a monster known as the profit motive. They’ll try to maneuver and manipulate Obama and his staff in ways that can have tragic consequences, but my guess is Obama is smarter than most of ‘em. But he won’t be willing to do the same things to get his way, either. He’ll play clean, and the the fellow that fights fair doesn’t always win.

Obama isn’t John Wayne in a white hat and this isn’t a film. It’s the real world, and bad guys win a bunch of the time.

Remember the old adage about keeping your friends close and your enemies closer? Well, that’s exactly what he’s doing. It will be harder to criticize him and polarize people if they get to know him and like him. Maybe he can charm them the way he’s charmed the nation. But there’s also another old saying about lying with dogs and getting fleas, and that’s what he will have to guard against.

No, I’m not calling for a Presidential flea collar, but he’ll need a steely will and some of the most deft maneuverability the White House has ever seen. There’s no magic about it. He’ll just have to be tough as nails and be able to master the great skill of knowing precisely when to hold your ground and when to compromise.

For us parents, we understand how this plays out every day in our homes. But Obama is a President and the stakes are therefore much higher. They’re the sort of stakes that give you grey hair and sleepless nights, since the fate of millions often lies in your hands.

As he spoke last night in front of the statue of Lincoln, I couldn’t help but think about how he’ll have to probably be our next Lincoln to get us out of this mess. The odds are high, no doubt. But Obama has a massive advantage over Lincoln, in that the people are firmly behind him. So, I’m cautiously optimistic, but then again, after the darkness of George Bush, I’d be optimistic about damn near anyone.

The dream vacation is set. Marathon, Texas, population 450.

Why is Marathon the dream destination? Because there’s really nothing there. A hotel, a few B&B’s, several art galleries, a book seller, a good bar, a couple of eateries, local train service and miles and miles of open space and hiking through west Texas and Big Bend National Park.

There aren’t any big houses or exclusive resorts in Marathon and hopefully there never will. We’ll have to hope the locals don’t sell out to opportunistic parasites with more money than sense and that they keep their shotguns handy. Enact some ordinances that restrict population growth and place a ceiling on real estate prices. Maybe even do away with private property altogether and recreate the commons.

Word on the street is a couple of executive chefs have made their way there, which is tolerable I suppose. Let’s just hope that doesn’t become a trend, because once it does, you’ll soon find your $9.95 t-bone, hash browns and Mexican strawberries (refried beans) replaced with Proscuitto wrapped european quail with port wine figs and a port soaked filet covered in caramelized shallot confit. (market price)

Adios, PBR and Lonestar and bonjour, Pinot Noir. Say “so long” to the $90,000 rancher and meet your new neighbor, a $500,000 non-sustainable monstrosity. And of course the latter attracts the attention of the tax man, so before you know it, you can no longer afford to live in the place you were born. Get outta here, local! Make room for us yuppies.

Happy trails, Fred and Hazel, here come Winthrop and Buffy and they’re bringing Buckhead with them.

Everything around here either bites, stings or sticks in your skin, so my advice would be to not come here. Stay home or if you just have to go somewhere, go to Aspen, Las Vegas or some other fancy pants place. Leave Marathon for us rednecks.

And no, while tempted, I’m not staying. I’ll come back to where I belong and leave Marathon as I found it. You do the same.

photo credit: WBIR Knoxville

Tucked safely away on page 12 in the appropriately named “National Briefing” section of today’s New York Times is a single paragraph about the major spill in East Tennessee.

“Brief” is the right word to describe the coverage this event has received in the national media and why more people are not outraged is beyond my ability to understand. Yes, CNN did cover it. So are multiple blog sites and the local media in Knoxville, but overall, the coverage on this story has been really weak.

It should be obvious to anyone with a functioning brain that the water in that area may not be safe to drink. Yet, ignoring the EPA report, local officials vouched for the safety of Roane County’s drinking water and criticized environmental groups. According to the Knoxville News Sentinel, “Kingston Mayor Troy Beets guzzled a cup of water, which he said came from the tap at his home and told reporters that since the spill, tap water was used to make formula for his 3-and-a-half-month-old great-grandson.

‘I want everybody to know that there’s no danger in drinking city water in Kingston,’ he said.”

Kinda reminds me of the local Chamber of Commerce official in the movie Jaws that insisted it was safe to get water and encouraged his own family to “jump in.”

Officials say TVA is taking “full responsibility.” I somehow doubt that, seeing how they’ve never taken full responsibility for any of the damage they’ve caused in that region, including high air pollution in the Smokies. I can remember many a hike along the Anakeesta ridge in awful air, as well as regular health warnings where people were actually told not to hike at high elevations in a NATIONAL PARK, due to high ozone level pollution.

The culprit? TVA coal-fired plants. Part of their so-called “green energy” program.

Well, let me tell you. Green energy doesn’t mean the same thing to me that it does to TVA. It means money to those guys, and keeping the spill as quiet as possible is good for business. Can’t have a little ole one billion gallon mishap get in the way of the ruse known as clean coal.